Have you checked?
28th February 2018 was a day, a grey day.
I had to skip along and have a mammogram at the local mobile unit. ‘The Cancer Catcher Van.’
I had to go, right? Best to keep yourself in a good space and know you’re clear. Same old… Hate the process but know it’s in place for a reason and ultimately very grateful we have it. I’ve been before.
It’s just the process. Cold wet grey day. They do keep it quite warm to be fair. And quite jovial! No choice when I walked in. I always like to find out things and try and boost someone’s day. Even the non communicative mammographer. Well, as I see it, if we are going to be getting intimate we may as well have a chat while we are at it!
It was a nonsense. The machine wasn’t working as the mammographer wanted. She was getting twitchy and I was practising that patience thing. Squashing and squeezing. More whirring with this massive piece of kit that they traipse around from town to town to make our lives easier than piling in to our local hospital. I’m moaning in my head and grateful all at the same time. Standing standing standing. She’s moaning and whinging now too. More moving me around. Oh come on! That bits in my head. And then. Hey presto! It worked. Picture taken.
‘Off you go’.
‘Can you see anything?’
‘Not my job’.
It is paramount that we make these checks. I can only encourage people to check breast and prostate and pay attention to every area of your body. I’m an ex professional dancer and used to being in tune with my body. I can understand that for some people that isn’t a normal thing.
It can be scary to go. Take someone with you if it helps. Talk to a professional first for encouragement. Just don’t let fear also masked as embarrassment debilitate you. If you are dragging your feet over something that is pissing your instincts off right now – I’m urging you speak to a friend at the very least. Your friends would all be happy to come and sit in the waiting room or at the very least the car while you have your appointment. Don’t go alone if it is too much. But right here and now don’t make that your excuse to not go either…
Now what happens next? Oh yep. Crack on. And for sure I’m going to forget I went.
Someone will be in touch if they need to. It’s one of those things that happens and then I move on. Too many other things in my head to retain that I even went. I can’t feel anything untoward in myself. Life is lived at breakneck speed single parenting two teenagers. Addled!! That’s me.
And funnily enough, that’s what I did. Forgot. Just like last time. Forgot I had been. Forgot about the cold grey day. Forgot the fiddle faddle with the mammographer. Forgot about the moaning and groaning. The whingeing. All of it.
They will be in touch if they need to see me again…